CUL DE SAC

Some people are satellites. They are the provider for the needs of earthlings but they are stuck in space. They hover in orbits with no gravity that give them the constant feeling of floating, a sense of escapism and happiness. Some people are satellites.

Marriage is a sacred union of men and women. My whole life I have witnessed marriage challenges from the people around me. Sometimes, some random friends would just, out of nowhere, talk to me about their marriage issues. Being a single man, I have no authority to talk about such sacred union but somehow my opinion matters. I understand women through the relationship that I have with my mother and I believe women are generally much stronger than man. Allah will never test His servant unless he/she is able to go through with it, and the tests for married women are never the simple ones. When I was a child, my mother ran all the show at home. My father was absent as he lived elsewhere. The thing about my father, we all knew he was not very faithful and responsible husband. Yet, my mother remained loyal. She was hurt but her strong faith in God took her a long way. Whenever my father came home, she would prepare only the best for him. That's my mom. She looks at the best interest of t...

MERDEKA!!! or MERDEKA??? The truth is, we are still colonised by our own people, the greedy, ruthless and selfish ones. We are colonised by those who want to play God, who dictate our thoughts and beliefs, who control our freedom. These people are thieves who rip our dignity with lies and dishonesty. The rich is getting richer and the poor is getting poorer but the-in-betweens are at risk of bankruptcy. Life in this country is not getting any better. We often hear double stan dards but the truth is there are layers of standards these days. Corruption has become common in many levels of officials. If you do not have money, you will not be able to get what you need easily. The grandest of sadness that I see so far comes from the intolerable mockeries made by those who have power. What have the people done to you that made you force us into this double jeopardy - making our life difficult and laughing at us for not being able to cope with the difficulties. Social media have steadfastly be...

Sometimes, I want things that I can't get (easily) like lying on the beach with you at night under the moonshine, countless stars and sound of waves, talking about anything, just anything.   *A foreign land

Friday, 14 August 2015. Mornings are splendid when one has a plate of fried kueh tiow and iced coffee in Hollywood, the true melting pot for all walks of lives in a small town called Ipoh, my hometown. As I left town when I was a teenager, I don't really have friends in Ipoh. So seeing me having food alone in Ipoh is a common sight. As I sat on a table under a shady tree, while waiting for my food to arrive, a couple with a child settled next to my table. The wife, who looked like a converted muslim, speaks good English. Not too long, an Indian auntie came to their table with their drinks, along with an earful of complaints on how lousy her coworkers are, something they didn't order in the menu but they listened to her anyway. That's the true Ipoh spirit. Nobody is a real stranger. Everybody is ever accommodating. Just express yourself and don't succumb in your troubles. I love the old Ipoh, relaxed and content. Today, Ipoh is rapidly developing. Malls are mushroo...

Those who judge may conclude bad things as bad but those who have faith can clearly hold spiritual substance in them. That's the difference between the believers and the almost believers. Don't just judge, you're not God. Regardless of how many times you pray in a day or whatever religious postings that you have on social media or even pray marks on your forehead, you are still not God. There are many Muslims out there who don't look pious but in the end, they could be the one chosen by God to enter Heaven. This is what Islam teaches us. The art of positivity and letting go.

Worry. I believe I may have picked up the habit of worrying from my mother. She worries a lot and when I'm worried, it's usually the deep and strong kind of worrying. Worry.  Jealousy. I remembered the earliest time when I started to feel jealous. It was during my childhood when I got jealous of my brother. I always felt my parents love him more than me. Nevertheless, I quickly got myself out of it. I knew my parents love us equally and differently. Jealousy. Worry and jealousy. When you are worried and you are jealous of someone, could it mean that you love that person?

Moments, little by little, they change us to become a better person or otherwise. I, as a firm believer that every person who walks into my life is a gift from God, am now stuck between moments and the person that I have become. Looking at where I am right now, after indulging in a relationship, I suddenly realise I am very much lonely and empty inside. How could this happen? When I was alone, I felt content and whole but now when I have someone with me, I am just alone. Come to think of it again, God is indeed great. I was too focused on the love below that I neglect the love above, the love for God. Astaghfirullah.

How could we just fall in love with each other so instantly? Because I could see myself in you  and you could see yourself in me. It's like our souls met for the journey of soulmates.

We all have a past, and in many cases, one we are not proud of. We can't help what happened to people before we knew them. All that matters is how they are now.

Date: 10 March 2011 Title: O! Love - Part 1 From: Facebook Notes Love, something I know very little of. I hardly open up myself to possibilities and taking chances on love because, to begin with, I am indeed blinded by the directions to love. For me, love is a feeling that needs to be earned. And when I feel something, I need to be sure with what I feel. Hence, time is a factor.  As feelings need to be developed over a per iod of time, I need to be showered with enough fun and troubles that would draw me in and out of a lot of feelings that would lead me to feel loved, can't live without each other kinda love. Realising my needs has their own flaws, what I need may not be needed by the other person. As a result, I feel that my happiness does not come to me easily - which is why I would rather focus on having fun rather than getting serious with anyone, a habit that has rooted my social skills. I've dismissed a lot of love confessions because most of the time, the t...

I've been thinking -- Is there such thing as "right and/or wrong" decisions? Decisions. They were made because they seemed right at that point of time. After some time, those right decisions seemed wrong. What you once thought were right no longer make sense. Choosing a career for example, eight years ago, I decided to teach because at that time, it was the right thing to do, given the fact that I was qualified for that profession and I generally enjoyed doing it. As time goes by, I began to venture other professions and somehow I've come to realise that I have to rethink of the choice I made eight years ago. Do I still want to teach or do something else? That's the thing about decisions. As time goes by, things change. People change. Feelings change. With whatever you decided long time ago, like career and life partner, you are bound to either maintain them or let them go. Rather than staying in a job that doesn't fulfil you or being in an unhappy marriag...

Friendships. They die due to many reasons such as: Two friends fight, the friendship dies. One friend moves to a different place, the friendship dies. One friend gets married, the friendship dies. Friendships. They are one of the most important relationships that many of us care so much that it hurts. It is not easy to live without a friend because to many of us, a friend is like the air that we breathe, it gives us a sense of purpose and support. When a friendship dies but two people are still pretty much breathing the same air, it's tragic; but when one friend dies but the friendship is pretty much alive, it's sweet. To a friend, a brother and a teacher. May you rest in peace. Al-fatihah Shahir Ali 1984-2015

Have you ever... stargazed the starless sky, talked to the unseen moon, wished you were an animal, drank a tasteless juice, catwalked on a pavement, counted sheep before you sleep, felt an electric spark when you held someone's hand. Every moment is a worthy moment. Every thought really counts. Every time is precious. And for that, every life is a treasure hunted by those who constantly define themselves.